Saturday, August 31, 2013

The End Of All Things

DAY THIRTY ONE OF BALA! I did it! I actually managed to blog (almost) every day in August! I'm so proud of myself because I haven't done a BALA in such a long time. I'm really happy.

Although BALA is ending, I will still try to talk to you guys at least twice every week during Friday, Saturday, and/or Sunday for the rest of the year. I will try and stick to this schedule at least until December, and we'll see where we're going to go from there, because by then I probably would know where I stand in school work and homework and whether or not I could manage keeping blogging up. I probably will though, so you don't have to worry (or do).

Today my dad finally finished the desk he was making for me. Yes, making. My father made me a desk. It's colour is a fabulous yellow, it has a drawer that can keep my school supplies, and more importantly, it is big enough to do all my homework efficiently! I love big desks because I have room to spread all my things and I don't really have time to think about stuff falling off my desk when I'm on the verge of some mathematical exercise question success. So yeah. I appreciate my father and his magnificence in carprentry.

I also found out that we own a sewing machine! My dad got it second hand in some website and it didn't come with an instruction manual so he never knew how to use it, but I'm going to try my best to make it work although I am about as experienced in sewing as a cat. I have already found an online instruction manual, so we will see how it goes. This sudden interest in sewing is not at all random. It's a result of watching to much Project Runway. It definitely got me super interested in fabric and designs and obviously sewing, which is a huge feat because I used to hate sewing. I got to do it as a school project when I was a wee first year in the Philippines but I never could get the sewing machine to work, so the "pajamas" that was going to be my final grade had a better purpose as a washcloth. However I'm going to try and change that attitude because sewing is actually a pretty useful life skill. I'll let you guys know how that one goes.

On a more sombre note, I want to address the death of a famous Irish poet, Seamus Heaney. I was never the biggest fan of him, but we did some of his poems in the Junior Cert and I remember relating quite well to his poem, Death of a Naturalist. My english teacher loved his poems and so I have so many memories sitting in class and reading and analysing his poems. I remember one winter in second year when it was snowing really hard, and there was only a few of us in class because the other girls were gone for some reason, and looking out the window was the most beautiful winter scene I had ever seen in my life. Everything was covered in white except for the pine trees, which served as a beautiful back drop for the falling snow. I think we were reading a poem of Seamus Heaney then. I didn't know that I even treasured this memory until now. The knowledge of his death gives me lonely, nostalgic feelings for my childhood, which I could feel slipping out of my grip. The start of fifth year ended something, which I can't quite put a finger on. All I know is that I feel like I'm running out of time, like I'm running on a treadmill that was set on a speed that is too fast and I'm struggling to keep up. Keep up with what, I don't know. But I'm this will all probably make sense further down the road, when I'm finally standing in a place that I'm presently dreading to be standing on.

Anyway, this marks the end of Blogging A Lot in August. I hope to see you guys real soon, and I hope you all have a lovely day!


Friday, August 30, 2013

The World of Youtube

Maybe I have talked about this before, maybe I haven't, but this post is going to be all about my favorite youtubers. If you have been reading my blog for long enough you may know that watching vloggers on youtube is one of my favorite pastimes (although admittedly I haven't been watching a lot of youtube lately due to overwhelming stress and school work). I won't talk about the vlogbrothers or missxrojas again because you're probably tired of hearing about them already, so let me introduce you to other vloggers that I also love.

Clothesencounters. Jenn Im is the only fashion vlogger that I'm subscribed to, and the reason for that is because of her style. I can totally identify with it and I admire how she wears them only for herself and no matter how eccentric a piece of clothing is, she doesn't let the thoughts of other people to stop her from wearing what she loves. Also, her videos are usually on point, not very long or very waffle-y, and is edited really well. She's very well-versed too which comes in handy when describing clothes or outfits. She's totally one of my fashion icons.

Marinashutup. Marina. How would you even begin to describe the wonderful creature that is Marina. She has a really dry sense of humour in her videos and I absolutely adore it. She reminds me a lot of Daria that way, which is incidentally one of my favourite shows of all time. She talks a lot about her shenanigans in community college and it is actually incredibly entertaining, so if you're looking for a female vlogger on Youtube, let me point you to her direction. You'll love her.

Tyrannosauruslexxx. Lex Croucher is one of the earliest female vloggers that I subscribed to. I think my friend Kate has said already what I would say about her but she's really inspirational for me too. She has an amazing, angelic voice, and her videos are often funny while also being very thought-provoking.

Looking back now on what I just wrote, I realise that all of these vloggers are so far female! It reminds me of Rosianna's I Love Ladies Tag, which I will probably do next week! Anyway. Moving on. More vloggers!

Dailygrace. The question is who doesn't watch her. She makes videos almost daily I think and is one of the funniest people that I know on the internet. She has humour similar to Marina but Marina's is a lot more drier in my opinion. Grace Helbig's humour is a lor more... moist. Wrong word usage I think. I'm just going to leave it at that. I'm just. Yeah.

Emilieofnewgloom. I first discovered Emilie during a Project for Awesome where she made the most artistic, beautiful, and touching Project For Awesome video I had ever seen. She has recently finished writing and directing her first movie, The Water's Fine, and last month (July) She made a series of videos called Letters of July which were incredibly personal and heartfelt. Watching her videos feels like reading a book that speaks to you in a way that no other book can.

Oldhotradio. Also known as Ophelia Dagger. She is so freaking cool, and funny, and smart. I feel like I'm talking to a close friend of mine when I watch her videos (of course that could also be the creepy "we're going to be best friends" whispered as an opening to her video). She also has a film channel where she reviews and talks about different films because she was a film students and that's also very interesting.

I think that's enough for today. I didn't know I was actually subscribed to a lot of female youtubers! But here they are, in all their amazing and fantastic glory. Click the links if you have time, you won't regret it.


Thursday, August 29, 2013

Going Down: Too Tired To Function Edition

Things that are going down in August:
  1. Insects coming into your damn room.
    Wasps. Are. Everywhere. I open my bedroom window for no more than thirty seconds (because I'm overheating) and suddenly I hear it. Bzzzzt. BzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZzzzt. It flies on the walls. It flies to the ceiling. It gets tired and lands somewhere. And then it sees light from outside and finally gets out to be FREEEEEEEEEEEEEE-thunk. Thunk bzzzzt thunk thunk. This is what it thinks. I mean, I appreciate that your taking the time out everyday to visit me, wasp, even in school, but I'm afraid that it's never going to work out between us. I'm sorry. It's not you, it's me.
  2. School related anxiety
    I've only been in school for two days and yet I'm already feeling so much stress. A lot of pressure is put this year for students to work and it's working for me, but it might be working too well. I don't know, maybe this is just me still getting a shock going from Transition Year to the Senior Cycle, but I'm still getting used to the rhythm of fifth year. I have been investing so much effort listening in class because I don't want to miss anything, and doing that really does suck the energy out of you, that by the last three classes I'm feeling exhaustion and sleepiness creeping in, and I'm also fighting really hard not to take a nap when I reach home. Also I've noticed that I've been hungry all the time ever since school started. It seems worth it though, because I'm keeping up really well with the work being given on me so far. By Christmas I'll probably see what the rest of the year is going to be like in terms of school work.
  3. More school related anxiety
    You probably notice it judging by how many times I've been saying it in the last three days or so, but school is so exhausting and tiring and all the other adjectives that are bad and ends with -ing. I just. Ugh. I barely have time to do BALA, and although I did enjoy doing it this month, I'm really, really happy that it's ending in like two days. I promise I won't leave you hanging though, I will try and put something up every Saturdays and Sundays for the rest of the year, and then we'll see what we're going to do after that. 
In conclusion, school is exhausting and wasps are annoying.


Wednesday, August 28, 2013

I'm Exhausted.


Today was our first official classes in school. Of course very few of my classes actually jumped into immediately teaching us and more of my classes gave us an overview of the course and the layout of the exams. It was still very exhausting and draining though. I am making a conscious effort of being a lot more attentive than I already was and it's a lot of work. By the time I got home I wanted to fall into a deep sleep and not wake up until tomorrow. However I won't get all my homework (already!!!!) done, so I decided to go against that and take my housemate's advice for me when I'm tired which is to put ice on my eyes and all over my face. It worked, and suddenly I had enough energy to do the work that I was given, which is obviously nothing compared to the actual homework that I would get normally, but still it is very mentally tiring.

I went to school today feeling physically sick of anxiety. I was so worried, and I don't even know why. Maybe because FIFTH YEAR (dun dun dunnn), but it was very strange for me to feel that way as first day back in school is for me the easiest day ever that has to do with school. Anyway, it did turn out to be quite overwhelming, as literally every teacher I had talked to us about their lesson plans for the year, and it just made the looming shadow of the Leaving Cert in the distance a lot more real than before. I suppose sometimes you need to have that sort of shock to get yourself studying, but I think it was a bit much for me. I went home exhausted and I called my Friend and had a little cry and the Friend gave me a whole lot of encouraging words that I really needed, and I felt much better. And now I'm on top of things and I know that that's not a huge thing because it's just the first day but I feel much more hopeful than before.

I think I need to finish this blog post up now because my father is about to go upstairs and take the laptop from me, so I guess I'll see you guys tomorrow. It's so much harder blogging when there's school ugh.


Tuesday, August 27, 2013

I Went Back To School Today! feat. Krizanne

I am extreeeeeeeeeeeemely pleased. I was very anxious going to school this morning, and I don't even know why that was. I mean, I've been doing the same thing for four (now five) years. But I think it was the thought that everything was changing this year and I have to take it seriously now that made me want to jump off a cliff. Today was a good start though. It was great seeing my friends again after a long time and seeing how the school has physically changed (for the better). I also got my time table, finally, and I'm pleased so far! I have the same maths teacher as I had from first to third year and I'm really happy because that teacher really worked for me, although a lot of students don't really like that teacher. Also, I have double history first thing on a monday morning, and that's completely fine with me because I adore history!

It just occured to me that August is nearly over and so is BALA. It was a good month for blogging for me I think, and I probably blogged more this month than I did all year. I'm not sure what's going to happen to this blog in September when the craziness settles in, but I hope I still get to blog even on the weekends. This month really brought out my love for blogging again. I do wish I can post more interesting things though, say, of travel and food and new people I meet. You know what? I may do that. I have my cousin Krizanne right here beside me, and I'm going to interview her!
Me: Hello Krizanne! How are you?
Krizanne: I'm fine!
Me: You have a really pretty name, which is probably what first crossed the mind of my readers. Do you have any idea where that name came from?
Krizanne: It came from the french bread, Croissant. When my mom was pregnant with me she loved eating croissant, like, she was obsessed with it. She made a variation of that name and gave it to me.
M: You are best known on the internet from your twitter, instagram, and facebook accounts. Tell us about how you got started with the internet business.
K: Well for facebook, you know the way it was really, really, like, sikat, because of Farmville? I asked my mom to make me a facebook because I didn't know anything about Facebook and I wanted to play Farmville because she said it was fun. So she made me one. With twitter, I was really curious. All my friends were talking about it, they told me to try it because we could follow local and international celebrities on it. I didn't know how to use it at first, me and my cousin were experimenting on it, and at one point I tweeted "Tweet me, I'm a bird." *Laughs* I really didn't know what was going on. And then that was it. After months and months I started enjoying Twitter. With Instagram, I had this friend from Barcelona, and she posted a picture with a frame and a filter, and I thought it was really really good. So I asked her where she edited the photo, and she said instagram, but you can only use it if you have an Apple product. That time I didn't have any Apple products, but then my friend Jasseh got one, she got an iPod. So I asked Jasseh to download Instagram on her iPod. There I made an account, and after three months I got an iPhone for my brithday! That's where it all started!

M: How did you manage to get thousands of followers on each platform? Do you have any tips you can give for people who might be looking for the same thing?
K: Well for Instagram I asked people to shout me out and I used a lot of hashtags. For Twitter, I don't know, I just started tweeting people, being friendly. That's it, and they started following me!
M: Do you ever get haters?
K: Yeah... on Instagram, random people just comment on my pictures saying I'm ugly or whatever, but I don't really mind, because I don't know them! Oh and once on Twitter I even got a poser! And she started hating on me and saying that she was the real me!
M: Oh my god! Did you manage to get rid of her in the end?
K: Well I asked my friends to help me, and in the end she admitted that it was because she liked my face. *Laughs.* It was all quite funny.
M: Do you have anything else to say to the readers of this interview?
K: I hope they enjoyed this thing, whatever this is. *Laughs* And... Follow me! *Laughs*

There you go! Give her a follow, she's pretty nice. And she helped me fill up the empty space of today's BALA, so THANK YOU KRIZANNE!!!


Monday, August 26, 2013

Childhood Dreams

Well, this is it. Summer is finally over, and whether I like it or not I'm going to have to say hello to fifth year tomorrow, the day my two-year long road-to-the-leaving pilgrimage starts. It's time to seriously start thinking about my future and all the other things that just sucks the fun out of life. You may or may not know the little pre-mid-life crisis I had last year, when I finally realised that I couldn't do everything I dreamt of as a child. That realisation actually almost broke me. It's the realisation that one life isn't enough.

Today I want to talk to you guys about the things that, as a child, I seriously considered myself doing. I didn't care how much it would cost me to do it, or how much time I have to spend one each occupation, or when in my life I'm going to fit becoming each of these things. I was going to do them and nobody could stop me.

1. An Astronaut
When I was twelve, my school invited a team of astronomers to give the entire high school lectures about celestial bodies. It was pretty awesome. We spent the night in the school field under the stars and we got to do all sorts of things such as look into a telescope and see different planets, and I got to hold a meteorite, and we were given a little handbook that deals with astronomy and all the wonderful things about it. That's when I seriously considered being an astronaut, and I actually haven't let go of that dream quite yet. Although I have my sights set on being a medical doctor, I still dream of being sent outer space for some reason and seeing what it's like out there. I still want to get on a space ship and step foot on the moon and maybe even on Mars. Of course the possibility of this happening is, like, zero, and I haven't really done my research on how to be an astronomer... It dawns on me now that maybe I should, if I really wanted it that bad. I have my entire self wrapped up on me being a doctor that I forgot about this one... I should really check it out again.

2. A Businesswoman
My uncle was a business man and I looked up to him so much. He was one of my role models when I was a kid and I thought of following his footsteps and wearing formalwear everyday with clunky heels and a briefcase, counting money in a cubicle, because that's what I though business people did. And then I actually studied Business Studies for the Junior Cert. Nope, not for me.

3. A Writer
I mean I haven't let go of this one either, only now I know that being writer is much harder than I previously thought. Also, I have sort of fallen in love with medicine as a course. But who knows, maybe I'd write a book along the way. I'm not closing this door yet.

4. A Medical Doctor
I don't even remember where this fascination with medicine started. But when I was younger and adults would aske me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I would always say a doctor. The ambition took a bit of a turn when the idea of me being a businessperson showed itself but not it's back and it's the only profession that I'm seriously, seriously considering. I have done my research and I know exactly what to do to be a doctor, it's just the actually doing it part that is a bit complicated. It's a long and very difficult road but I truly see myself doing this job for the next 40 years, because everything about it is so interesting to me. It's definitely right now my first choice of an occupation.

5. A Prima Ballerina
I told you guys about my love and devotion for ballet before coming to Ireland, and I used to dream of getting the lead part in a ballet show when I get older. The chances of that happening are so slim now I can't even see it, but the dream was good while it lasted.

6. An Acrobat
This was even more fleeting than my dream of being a prima ballerina, but ugh it would be so cool if I can actually do it! And I think all I have to do is join a circus. And work on my skill as an acrobat, obviously. I think this is going to be my back up plan if I don't succeed on being a doctor.

I think that's all I'm going to share today. There were a lot more of course, fleeting ones, but dreams nevertheless. Writing this post made me think of that Frank Sinatra song, High Hopes.
Just what makes that silly ol' ant 
Think he'll move that rubber tree plant
Anyone knows an ant can't move a rubber tree plant
But he's got high hopes, he's got high hopes
He's got high apple pie in the sky hopes
So anytime you're gettin' low, 'stead of lettin' go, just remember that ant
Whoops there goes another rubber tree plant
Whoops there goes another rubber tree plant
People always say we can do anything, but I wish we could do everything.


Theme song of the day: High Hopes by Frank Sinatra

Sunday, August 25, 2013

New School Year's Resolutions

I go back to school on Tuesday (!!!) and I'm having pretty mixed emotions about it. On the one hand, I'm kind of glad that I'm not spending all day every day cooped up inside the house anymore, because I've been feeling very suffocated in here. I mean I love my family and all, but, I don't think living together is for us anymore. I've grown up quite a lot over the past couple of years and I'm beginning to think that this is no longer the place for me. Anyway, on the other hand, homework and stress and lots of other growing up stuff that I'm not too thrilled about. I'm on the senior cycle now and I kind of have to get serious about studying if I want to achieve the kind of life that I want for myself. So I'm going to talk to you guys about my new school year's resolutions, which I may or may not succeed on, but it's worth the try.

First, I really want to start asking more questions in class. I'm kind of always reluctant to ask questions in class because I really don't want to draw attention in myself any more than I probably already am. But this year I'm really going to try and raise my hand if I don't understand anything or if something doesn't seem right to me. I really do think that it's a very important thing to do so even though it would take a lot for me to raise my hand and have the entire class look at me while I talk, I'm going to have to do it.

Secondly, do weekend homework on Fridays. I'm doing in-school study this year so I probably would do the bulk of my work on that two-hour period, but sometimes when there's a particularly huge amount of work to do, I would have a lot of leftover work, that I end up doing on the Sunday night before school because I spent all weekend procrastinating and telling myself that it's not procrastination but a "reward" for myself for working all week. No. Homework's on Friday night and that's it.

Third is to not leave non-written homework for later just because they're non-written homework. I tend to do all the written stuff first (usually in the two-hour in-school study period) and then do the non-written work at home, which of course usually ends up not getting done. This year I'd try to do my work so that I'm alternating between written work and non-written work. Easier said than done, but as I said, I have to take this year seriously.

Fourth is to spend a maximum of one hour online everyday, which is for reading rookie, watching a few videos, visiting tumblr (30 minutes MAX), and writing a blog entry, if I have something to write about. It's a full blown party all through Saturday and Sunday of course, because I trust that I already have all the work that I needed to do on the Friday.

And fifth, is to try my hardest. It doesn't even have to be perfect, it really doesn't. But when I get my results in 2015 I have to know that whatever points I get were the highest possible points that I could have gotten, based on my abilities. I want to get my results and be happy with whatever I got. Really future Danielle, that is all I ask of you.

That's all for my resolutions this school year. I know that it's going to be hard because me and any kind of planning are not really the best of friends, but I really need to try my hardest. It's not going to be fun but it's going to be rewarding.


Saturday, August 24, 2013

Going Up // August

I'm loving Rosianna's Going Up and Going Down series on her youtube channel, so I want to do a similar thing in my blog. I'm going to put up a Going Down post later this week, but right now, here are the things that are Going Up in August.

1. The Library
I used to be obsessed with going to libraries about two summers ago. I would go in almost every day borrowing like three books at a time. But the visits faltered when third year of secondary school started, because Junior Cert, and I just didn't have time to go to the library then on account of all the work and all the procrastination I was too busy doing. When the Junior Cert ended I found it hard to get back into the habit of visiting the library. Until recently! I've been going to the library quite a lot since I came back from the Philippines and I totally forgot how handy and super reliable it is. Right now I have Fight Club by Chuck Palahnuik and Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury out.

2. Reality TV
There's this TV channel in the Philippines called ETC, which streams mostly american TV shows all day. Since I didn't really like the rest of the channels available to me, and also we didn't have internet in our main home, I ended up watching TV shows from this channel in my free time. I didn't really like the drama shows but it surprised me how much I enjoyed the reality TV shows! I loved and still am loving Project Runway (I'm still keeping tabs on season 12!), and I also enjoyed America's Next Top Model a lot. Getting Sky cable just reinforced this new found love for reality TV, and I find myself watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians more than I would like to. I also rewatched Made In Chelsea season one last month but I didn't make it until season two because I got too frustrated with the story line. Ugh let's hope this reality TV show phase diminishes when the school year starts!

3. Rookie Magazine
I have been reading a lot of Rookie online magazine lately! I found it through bollykecks' tumblr because she's one of the illustrators of the site, and I'm really thankful that she is because now I cannot stop reading it! The articles are super interesting and different from any other magazines that I have read, the book/music/TV recommendations are always up my alley, and it also keeps me updated on important news especially the ones that involves feminism! I'm totally digging it and I would recommend it to absolutely anyone who likes to read.

4. Brownie in a Mug
I got this trick from my housemate. You basically combine flour, sugar, cocoa powder, olive oil, water, and salt in a mug, mix it up and stick it in a microwave, and you got yourself some brownies. You can top it with ice cream if you want, but it really isn't necessary. The only thing is that it can be too sweet and as a result slightly nauseating, which is exactly the kind of food you want to eat while watching trashy television. If you want the fancier full recipe of it, click here.

5. School Supplies
I mean, do you really want a reason? I went school supplies shopping today for the upcoming school year (which is starting on Tuesday by the way, damn everything), and I loved it. As usual I bought way more than I actually need, but school supplies are as good as chocolate to me so I couldn't really help myself. It's the one perk of coming back to school.

6. This Writing Mix on 8tracks
It's such a good soundtrack while you're writing/reading/studying because it keeps you concentrated on what you're doing, and also it involves music from almost every TV show/movie that I love, including but not limited to: Doctor Who, Sherlock, and The Hobbit. If you're into music while you work and loves the TV shows and movie that I just mentioned, I suggest you go check it out.

That's all for this week, I think! I'll talk to you guys before the end of the month for the Going Down post, but before that I'll see you guys tomorrow! Hopefully!


Friday, August 23, 2013

Lifescouts | Ballet

Ballet was the love of my life. I did it from when I was in fifth grade up to the summer before I went to Ireland, which lasted just over three years. I gave it up because of many reasons, one of which was I had a lot on my plate when I migrated and I just couldn't handle adding ballet into it. So I stopped. Looking back now it was a stupid decision, because I loved dancing and it would've relieved me of the stress I was dealing with. But what happened has happened. I am thinking of going back to it though. But I'm just concerned about the clash it may cause with choir and voice lessons that I'm going to take too. We will see though.

I remember when I had my first ever ballet lesson. The first thing I did when I came home that day was put my ballet shoes back on and repeat the class that I just took. Also feeling absolutely over the moon when my teacher told me that I was finally going en pointe. I remember that I just felt so happy when I was doing ballet. Ugh *sigh*

I hope I can do it again soon.


Thursday, August 22, 2013

I Want A Home Library

I love interior design. Although I can't design a room myself (seriously, where does one start?), I like looking at the work of interior designers and seeing how coordinated and lovely the room is, and what kind of mood it has. When I was younger, I would cut up furniture from Argos catalogue that my uncle who works in Ireland would bring home, and I would stick them onto a sheet of paper to create my ideal room. (I would also spend a ridiculous amount of time making and spending my own paper money. Like, when I think of my childhood I just think of myself doing calculations of how much money I have and then taking the cost of the furniture I just "bought" and subtracting that from my money and I would do that again and again and again and again. I mean aside from playing with my 18 barbies, that was all I did. Calculations. That was my childhood. I also made myself a rule book on playing jackstones. Seriously. And I would get a serious kick out of them. Maybe I'd write a blog post on my childhood soon.)

Anyway, I kinda digressed a bit there, today I want to talk to you guys about a serious dream of mine. Ever since I got very into books in 2009, I've wanted to have my own library in my house. Your stereotypical library. You know, like, with the fireplace and the ladder with wheels that moves on the shelves, and the armchair and the carpet. Leather bound books on the shelves. Dramatically low lighting on the ceilings but bright lamps just beside the comfortable armchairs for reading sessions. There would also be a large mahogany desk on one side of the room with a really comfortable office chair behind it so that I could work there if I ever need to. Like, to do taxes or the house budgeting or something, which as I've told you in the first paragraph I've been doing since I was about nine. The colour scheme would be rich, earthy tones, like reds and browns, maybe a bit of dark green and dull gold. There would be a vintage looking globe somewhere in the room, and a map of the world on a wall. Oh and wallpaper would be dark, dark red would be the main colour and then the features would be dull gold. The carpet would be dark red almost brown too. If I have kids by then there would also be little vintage school desks somewhere in the room where they could do their homework or study. The kids' books won't be in the room, however, that would be in their nursery. The library would probably be located in the basement of the house, if our house has a basement.

Ah, be still, my heart. 

And now I shall provide you with pictures.

(ohmygod you guys I was looking at google for pictures with which to provide you and I found this interior design site and it was my perfect room. Click here if you want to see that but I'd put the images below anyway.)

Wednesday, August 21, 2013


This is an unpublished blog post I tried to write last spring that I just rediscovered in my drafts today:
Winter is my favourite season. I just love the whole feeling of those three months: the smell of smoke in the air, the snow, the cold, the fireplace, and the whole staying-inside-there's-no-way-I'm-going-out business. There's something strangely homely and familiar to me about the season. And it is strange because I've never even experienced winter until about 4 years ago. However, I have to say that I'm very, very grateful that Spring is here. Winter this year was, to be frank, rubbish. I mean, there was no snow! 
There's no particular point in this post (again). I just wanted to share some of these pictures I took when I went for a walk today while talking about... stuff. You know, marionhoney style. 
So you know the feeling of dread and nervousness that you feel in your stomach before you do something you know you're going to be terrible at, like before an exam you know you didn't study for? I've been feeling that for about 2 weeks now. I know, I've said this a couple of posts ago, but I haven't experienced this feeling for 2 weeks ever before. I'm just feeling so damn anxious all the time. And I can't do anything about it because I don't even know why I'm feeling anxious all the time. I feel fine when I'm laughing and talking with my friends but it comes back when I'm alone. I just feel so sad. Why?

I think I published the pictures mentioned in another blog post, but I never published this post, and I think it was because it was (and still is) a really big deal that I didn't even want to talk about it, even online.

The thing was that I took a risk. A giant, big, kinda foolish risk, and I didn't know how it was going to turn out. I was anxious because I was waiting for something that I wasn't sure was going to come. I was anxious because there was finally going to be a closure to a situation that has been slowly eating me up inside for the past four or so years before I wrote that post. I strayed way too far out of my comfort zone and I took a risk.

And it all paid off.

Kate and I were going to have a themed day today, in which we give each other quotes and we write about them. I was given something by T.S. Eliot:
Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
If I hadn't taken that risk a year ago, I wouldn't be anywhere as happy as I am right now. And I guess I just wanted to remind myself that things do work out in the end, no matter how awful it seems like at the time. I've been worrying a lot about the future especially over the last two months, and I have no idea how things are going to work out, and I hate that feeling of not knowing things. But things have a way of resolving themselves, even if they don't go the way you have planned it. It all fits together ultimately, like a jigsaw.

Everything will be alright.


Tuesday, August 20, 2013

This Is The Most Dangerous Thing I've Ever Done

Guess who just cut her own hair.

I did it mostly for the Children with Hair Loss organization as part of the #hairforhazel campaign that is going on right now, but also because I wanted to. 

I've never cut my own hair before. It is something that I've always been afraid to do for fear of ridicule, what I'll look like with my hair short and not cut by a proper hairdresser, etc., which is completely stupid because it's hair. It will grow back the same as when you got rid of it. So why was I so scared to let it go?

So yeah. I finally did it. I totally love the way it looks like right now. I feel a bit like Knives Chau, and I've been dancing around my room with Dog Party songs playing in my head. I feel good, you know? I know it's just hair but this is a huge deal for me because I finally did something that I've always felt afraid to do.

This reminds me of that verse in Letter to my 16 Year Old Self by Watsky: 
Future you is just past you with new molecules
We shoot the old ones out follicles
And hair is dead cells, so our faults get shed well
Meaning our parts that are hard to adore
Get mopped up on the barber shop floor
I'm going around to the post office probably tomorrow to mail off my hair to the Children for Hair Loss organization.

I hope you all are having as good a day as I am.


Theme song of the day: Fire and Ice by Dog Party

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Lives I Like To Look At

I know I haven't been writing for the past couple of days. I don't have any good reason for that but I doubt anyone here missed me anyway. That is if anyone is actually here. Does anyone read this thing? Hello??? Anyone?

Ugh I'm in such a bad mood right now. Family can drive you so crazy. It's gotten so bad around here that I try not to come out unless I really have to. Like, to eat, or something. I realise that doesn't help the problem, but I really don't want to talk to anyone here right now.

Anyway. I'm sorry about that little rant. Onto the actual blog post! I have been talking to Kate and we have decided that today would be a themed day, the theme being childhood. But I don't really want to talk about my childhood right now on account of how awful I'm feeling, so let's talk about one of the things that make me really happy: blogs.

I follow a lot of people's blogs and many of them are personal blogs because I love looking into another person's life a little bit. Quoting Paper Towns, "“It is easy to forget how full the world is of people, full to bursting, and each of them imaginable and consistently misimagined.” Blogging sort of makes me remember that again. Although I know that I'm still misimagining the kind of person that they are because I'm thinking of them the way that they would like to be thought of, It does make me remember that I'm not the only one going through bad times and good times and feeling disappointments and regrets and excitement and boredom and happiness. There are so many people just like me, feeling like this, so even though I do feel like I'm alone inside my room feeling like nobody understands me, the truth is so many people actually do. So. I would like to share to you guys some of the blogs that I love reading.

Goodnight, Little Spoon
The first one is Bianca, a.k.a the cutest person in all of the internet. She shares little snippets of her life, sometimes DIYs, the things she has thrifted, and also outfit posts. I'm just completely in love with her style, she always looks so adorable. I also love her "Little Joys" series which she posts every month, I think. Here she rights all the little things that has made her happy each month. Lately, she has been posting a lot about her son, Theodore, who she just gave birth to. Guys, I'm telling you, just check out her blog. You'll drown of adorable and cute and all the lovely things.

The Road Is Home
This one is a family blog by Nirrimi, Matt, and their daughter Alba. Here Nirrimi writes about the adventures of their family, posts pictures of the places they went to, Alba's little antics, and their life. It's incredibly personal and Nirrimi's writing style is very sweet and touching and you could so easily just get lost in it. They're photographers so the pictures they take are breathtaking too.

Joseph Birdsong
He's incredible in vlog form, and he's amazing in blog form. In his blog he writes just about everything in such a wonderful way that I can't really describe, but it's just like you're having coffee with a friend and they're talking to you about their life. I love it.

Paris in Four Months
Paris in Four Months is a blog hosted by Carin, who loves and lives in Paris. She's got such amazing photography skills! Maybe it's just me still being hung up on Rome and Paris looking remarkably similar to Rome apart from a few differences, but I love looking at the pictures she puts up of the streets of Paris, the food, the flowers, the view, the sunset, everything. I can't help but feel a lot of wanderlust while looking through her pictures.

A Hitcher's Goof Hunt
Am I biased? Maybe. But I do genuinely like reading my friend Kate's blog. We're trying to blog a lot in August this year and I just love the quality of the posts she puts up. She just started this blog site this month, she was formerly blogging on tumblr. A lot of her posts are very thought provoking, be it about fashion, or regrets, or the way we set goals for ourselves. I do strongly recommend anybody at all to check out her blog.


Thursday, August 15, 2013

Setting Goals

The people who took the Leaving Cert last June got their results yesterday, and, as always, some are fine with what they got, some are extremely happy, and of course some are extremely disappointed. Happens every year. I'm going to sit my exam two years from now, and I really want to be happy with whatever I get. I realise that being me, that means getting an A in almost everything, which is damn near impossible.

I'm a sucker for goals. I love them. I love setting them for myself, I love when I could feel the process of reaching that goal molding me into becoming better at whatever I want myself to become better at, and of course I love the feeling of achieving that goal, of finally reaching the top of the mountain I was trying to climb. Of course there's also the other side of that situation, when I fail at reaching the goal that I'm trying to get to, and I would spend more than I probably should wallowing and feeling sorry for myself and feeling disappointed and sometimes quitting altogether.

The problem is I nearly always set goals that are too hard to reach or too advanced for my skill, which I guess is good because I always have something to strive for, but at the same time I take it too hard on myself when I fail at reaching that goal, even though I know that it was too difficult for me. Growing up I was taught to always strive for perfection, to be the best at whatever it is I'm doing. My parents didn't appreciate mistakes. they still don't. They don't see how valuable mistakes can be, how one can learn from it so s/he wouldn't make the same mistake again. And so I grew up inheriting that kind of mindset, that I always have to do things perfectly and I should always come out the best at whatever field it is. I have learned what is wrong with that mindset now and that I should strive for the best that I myself can do and not compare myself to other people. But I guess the problem now, that I think stemmed from how I was raised, is setting unrealistic goals for me and not fully recognizing what I am and I'm not capable of.

And so that's what I'm trying to change this year. For the next two years I'm going to try and analyse myself properly, to accept that I can't be really good at everything and to lower my unrealistic expectations and yet still have something to strive for. When I get my results and I don't have an A in, say, Chemistry, I want to be able to not look down on myself and to recognise that that was the best that I could do in that subject, and there was no way that I could've done better.


Wednesday, August 14, 2013

9 Reasons Pizza Is Better Than Cake

Mine and Kate's challenge for today is to generate a topic in a blog post topic generator, provide the missing words, and write a blog post about it.

So, without further ado,
 ~Nine Reasons Pizza Is Better Than Cake~
  1. You can have pizza delivered to you (almost) anytime, (almost) anywhere.
    Lots of establishments offer pizza delivery so you won't even need to leave your house to get pizza! The pizza will come to you in probably less than half an hour.
  2. John Green's favourite food.
    It is the favourite food of John Green, writer of several best selling novels that has broken many a reader's hearts. If that's not reason enough for you to pick pizza, then I don't know what is.

  3. Tumblr user pizza.
  4. Calories. I myself don't calculate the calories of food I eat, but if you do that then I've got good news for you. Pizza has less calories than cake! Google said that a 14" regular pizza has 266 cal per a hundred grams, while sponge cake has 289 cal per a hundred grams. I mean I know it's only 21 calories, but for an average european, that is what you burn if you run at the speed of 10 km/h for 2 minutes!
  5. Pizza is healthier.
    Pizza is a fairly acceptable main course for lunch/dinner because it has enough nutrients to sustain you during the day. Or, well, until the next meal at least! Cake is a dessert that contains lots of sugar and won't do as good a job in keeping you going during the day as a pizza would.
  6. Cooking Technique.
    I mean, just look at this badassery:
  7. Eating Pizza Reduces the Risk of Cancer
    According to a bunch of Italian researches, pizza can reduce the risk of developing oesophageal cancer, colon cancer, and mouth cancer! The reason for this could be lycopene, a chemical found in tomatoes that is thought to give protection from cancer.
  8. You only need your hands!
    Pizza can be eaten without a fork or a plate or anything because it's perfect and will not make you all messy.

  9. YES.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Another Half-Assed BALA Post Oh Man

I really should start writing my post earlier because as I am writing this, my dad is knocking at my door asking demanding for the laptop back.

Uhhhh what do I talk about what do I talk about

I know what I'll talk about tomorrow, but that's not really helpful for me right now.

I spent most of today in bed because I'm lazy and also ironing my clothes in the afternoon. After I type this up I'll probably continue with that.

That's literally it you guys.


Monday, August 12, 2013


So yesterday was a sad day for various reasons, but one of them is that I totally forgot to write a blog post!!!

arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh *headdesk*

However I will still be continuing to blog for the rest of the month, except now I'm doing BALA (Blog A Lot in August) instead of BEDA. It's not as impressive, but, you know. You gotta do what you gotta do.

Yesterday was a neutral day, I had a bad morning that sort of bled through the afternoon, but me and my cousin and my aunt went shopping! Which I love, because I like getting new things. Yesterday I bought a new pair of dungarees, but with a skirt at the bottom instead of shorts if you get what I'm saying. I also bought a black 3/4 top with mesh thingy at the neck/chest area. Both of these are from Penneys. And then at Boots I bought a new red lipstick from Rimmel London called "Alarm," because I can't find my other red lipstick anywhere. No pictures, though, I'm sorry, I still don't have a camera!

Also lipsticks. I'm loving them a lot lately. I'd love to have a poppy-colored one, kind of red-orangey in colour, and a dark plum one. Like, really dark violet.
(third one from the left)
And since we're talking about fashion/beauty things anyway, can I just talk about this person from lookbook I've discovered called Nadia Esra? She's a 21 year old from the Netherlands and she's got the most amazing style and I love it. Also, her hair is absolutely gorgeous.

Also, I guess she's not really a fashion blogger but I adore Caitlin from bollykecks' style. She was what I was thinking about when I bought that skirt dungarees! I just love how cute she looks all the time, and she has the most amazing shoes!

So I was thinking of ways to personalise my dungarees, and I thought of patches so I headed to etsy to find cool ones, but there's lots of cool ones! I mean, look!


I think that would be all for today's blog. I'm sorry it's kind of all over the place, I'll try to make a better one tomorrow!


Saturday, August 10, 2013

New Things

Today I tried out a new project, thanks to Rookie. I'm making it for one special person only and so I'm trying to make it as good as it can get. As a result, I am quite busy today, and so you're not going to get a quality post from me!

I will make up to you tomorrow, I promise!


Friday, August 9, 2013


This is the first time that I made a tag so do forgive me if it's rubbish, but I don't feel like writing a BEDA today so I'm kind of cheating. Anyway, QUESTIONS!

*May contain spoilers from Paper Towns, The Fault in our Stars, and Harry Potter.*

1. Which book universe would you most like to live in?
It all comes down to the two book universes that I fell in love with, The Lord of the Rings universe, and the Harry Potter universe. And I'm choosing Middle Earth. I WANT TO LET MY HAIR FLOW IN THE WIND AS I RIDE THROUGH THE GLEN FIRING ARROWS INTO THE SUNSET. I've said this in another post before, but there's something about J.R.R.Tolkien's story-telling skills that makes you believe in it. It makes you imagine a land before humans were the dominant species, a land where elves and dwarves and hobbits dwell, full of adventures and mysteries waiting to be discovered. I want to live in Middle Earth so bad.

2. If you could be any character in any book, who would you be?
Maybe I'm a bit biased because Paper Towns is my favourite book, but I wouldn't say no to being Margo Roth Spiegelman. Her spontaneity is something that I want to, but highly doubt I would ever, have. I love her scheming skills, her planning of huge pranks and her ability to carry them out. I love her adventures, the way she can just leave everything behind to just do something that she wants to do, the way she could just leave and literally chase whatever it is that she wants. She is just an amazing mastermind. I've never had the courage that she has, nor that I think I ever will. But then again, it's too early to say.

3. Which fictional family from any book would you join?
The Weasleys, no question. I mean does it even need a reason? I love their family and their house and the way they're so close to each other and so tight-knit. They're also really funny and so interesting. I mean any family would be if the Weasley twins is there. I also really love how so motherly Mrs. Weasley is. She's so supportive and strong and she would protect her kids to the ends of the world. She's really warm and welcoming and I just love her so much.

4. If you could have any character in any book as a best friend, who would it be?
I would love to be friends with Charlie and the whole gang from Perks of Being a Wallflower. I just think they're so much fun and I would really love hanging out with them.

5. Which character from any book would be your nemesis?
Ohmygod. It's Monica, Isaac's (ex) girlfriend from The Fault In Our Stars. I remember just being so angry at her for leaving Isaac, when she promised she'd be there "always." In the words of Isaac himself: "I'm about to lose my eyesight and she can't handle it." And when Isaac said, "Love is keeping the promise anyway... and I love her. And she promised. She promised me always," my heart broke into a million pieces and I had to put the book down and cry a good cry. So Monica. From The Fault In Our Stars. She would be my nemisis.

6. Which character from any book would you want to be your mentor?
Atticus Finch. He is a really wise character. He's also very dignified, and kind, and everything you want your mentor to be.

7. If you could have any occupation from any fictional book, what would you be?
It would be pretty cool to be an Auror. I mean I realise that that occupation is at odds with me being in Slytherin House and also me being not at all very courageous, but it's still a cool job. Otherwise I guess I'd just do officework at the Ministry. Or else work at St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries.

8. You have a clique. You can choose any character from any book to be in on your clique. Who would you choose?
Ramona Flowers, because she's super cool in like, the 90s definition of "cool," Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley, because Hermione is a character that I would forever admire and also Ron is really funny, and them together is an explosion of adorableness, and then maybe Gandalf.

9. You can ask any character from any book one question. What would it be?
I would ask Percy Jackson from the Percy Jackson series, HOW CAN YOU NOT TELL WHAT'S ABOUT TO HAPPEN IN THE FIRST FEW BOOKS OF YOUR LIFE. Seriously though, those first few books are so incredibly predictable.


That's all goodbye!


Thursday, August 8, 2013


This post would probably make a lot more sense to you if you like watching people on Youtube and also if you know what is going on. Also I'm not trying to invade people's privacy, this is just me talking to you about where I stand on things just so I can get these things out of my head.

I like Youtube. I became a Nerdfighter in 2010, which was around the time that I was still adjusting from moving to Ireland. I was also still trying to find out what kind of person I am, because I was forced to live without the things that I thought I wouldn't be complete with and what I thought was a large part of who I am, so I was just completely lost. It sounds incredibly cheesy but the Vlogbrothers and the Nerdfighteria community helped me out enormously during those times. They gave me friends, and books, and ideas that I had never heard of before. They made me laugh and cry and they taught me to emphatize. They helped shape the kind of thinking that I have now, and for that I owe them a lot. If it wasn't for Nerdfighteria and the Vlogbrothers, I wouldn't have learned to question things and to strive to learn more than what the school system teaches me.

What I'm trying to say here is that the people that I watch on Youtube, the people whose videos I like and comment in, have made a huge impact in my life, and yes, I admit that I care about them more than a regular viewer probably should. I do respect their privacy and I understand that their lives are not mine, but I do care a lot about them.

And so the recent events have left me a little bit shaken.

Not only because the person involved was a person that I looked up to and whose work I admired, but also because I am female. Upon hearing the news I was terrified. I felt threatened and yes, intimidated by the society, by, not just those who openly criticise feminist ideas, but more so those people who openly support feminist ideas. I am a trusting person, and it is difficult for me to not believe a person when there is no proof that they are lying. But now that certain things have happened, I don't know what to believe anymore.

I along with my classmates went to Pompeii and its sister town Herculaneum last May. The two towns were so incredibly civilised by the time Vesuvius erupted. They had dams and politics and advertisements  and restaurants, and I remember the one thing that struck my mind when I was there was that how can the world and our society still have so many problems to deal with, when we were already so advanced by 79 AD? You would think that we would have at least gotten over prejudice and inequality and maybe even poverty by now but we haven't, and it almost seems like the world jumped a few years back after 79 AD, and now we're more or less where we were in 79 AD.

All I want is equality of all kinds. All I want is for people, no matter how different their background or social status are, to be treated the same. To be given the same amount of respect and opportunity and voice. I don't see what's so hard to accept and comprehend about that.

I'm just so tired of the bullshit.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

What Do I Write About For Today's BEDA, Kate?

So as you guys probably all know by now, Kate and I are coming up with themes for most of each day of BEDA. Well, more like Kate. I just say yes to everything she says.

I try putting up posts before 9pm most days, because at which point my father knocks at my bedroom door and takes the laptop away from me (prayer circle for me please and thank you).


I just found out a lot of disturbing things about certain people in a community that I identify myself with and I care about. I'm not in the right mind to do a proper BEDA today, so I apologise. But I may have a lot to say when I have my thoughts sorted out.


Tuesday, August 6, 2013

This One Doesn't Have A Theme

I'm not in the mood to write a BEDA post today.

But you know what? I'm going to do it anyway! Because it's only day six and I can't give up!

I spent most of today feeling sick. I didn't get to go to sleep last night because that's just the kind of person that I am, so by seven am I decided to call it and get out of bed, since I'm not going to get any rest from it anyway. About 20 minutes after I got up I felt the most excruciating pain in my lower abdomen area, and I cried like a baby and crawled to my mother and she made me feel better in the magical way that only mothers can do. I'm okay now I think, I just hope the pain doesn't come back again.

You know what you shouldn't do when you feel ill? Don't go on google and type whatever symptoms you are feeling, because no matter what it is they will have only one answer for you, and that is: you're going to die. And it will make you panic and worry about the problem that your body probably doesn't even have. I mean as much as I have issues about life and as much as I say "please just kill me" when I'm in situations that are even slightly discomforting for me, I don't actually want to leave life yet. Shocking, I know. But I just feel like I have so many things that I want to do and places that I want to go to and food that I want to eat that it would be so tragic if I left now, when I haven't even experienced even a quarter of the things I want to experience yet. So yeah. This is me appreciating life and its many wonders and me saying that no, universe, you can't take me out yet. Please don't make me go through the pain I went through this morning again.

After I kinda got over the whole pain thing, I had a nap for like two hours and woke up again. I haven't had proper sleep since like 2 pm yesterday. Maybe this is why I'm having these pains. Maybe I have to take care of myself more. Maybe I should drink more water and exercise and go to bed early so I could get up early. Maybe I should eat more fruits instead of popcorn as a snack. Maybe I'll try and do these things starting now.

I'm thinking of getting myself checked, because I am worried about myself. I just want to know what's up.

Anyway. Moving on.

I watched The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy this afternoon since I've finished the second of the first two books a couple of nights ago. It's, like, everything I've expected and some more. I know there's a lot of differences from the book (I don't actually know, I've only read the first two books because the movie is called The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.), but man, the cinematography of the movie and the way the story was told was absolutely incredible for me! Also. Zooey Deschanel??? NOBODY TOLD ME ABOUT THIS. I loved her and Martin Freeman and I totally shipped them until the very end. Also Marvin is a bucket of depressing adorableness and I just found out that he was voiced by Alan Rickman. I mean it's like all of my favourite actors in one film.

The one thing that I didn't end up liking in the movie was how they cut a lot of the story of Zaphod, because yes at first he is a total jerk especially to Arthur but by The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, he grows on you, you know? You end up finding out another dimension to him, and he's not just an arrogant son of a witch anymore. They cut a lot of that in the movie and Zaphod ended up being portrayed as just a raving lunatic.

I did like that the tone of the movie is more hopeful too. Arthur Dent totally steps up and even becomes some sort of a leader in the film. I don't know if the same thing happened to the books though. Also planet Earth gets restored to its former glory (?), which I preferred a lot more than the ending of the second book. Because this is my home. I'm not sure if that happens later on in the book series though... I know, I know, I need to finish the series first before making comparisons. I'll let you guys know.

Okay I think that's quite enough babbling for me. I'll talk to you guys later,

Monday, August 5, 2013

On Regrets

I am a really bad decision-maker. I always the fear that I might be choosing the worse of the choices for myself, and so it usually takes me time to make a decision. Even for mundane and less important tasks like shopping. I can't go into a shop and just buy something that I like because there is always that part of my brain that goes, "Well what if there's a better one in that other shop?" And so if I made a decision that turned out to be for the worse, I wallow instead of doing something to repair what ever damage I had caused. I cry and the feeling of regret slowly eats me up inside.

There is just one thing in my life that I regret the most, and unfortunately I can't talk about it openly to protect the people involved. When I made that one decision, I pretended that everything was fine and dandy, that I made the right decision for myself and mostly, that I didn't regret. But I did. I regretted that one decision real bad. Three years after I made that decision I would still feel bad about it. Lucky for me though, the time did come when I had the opportunity of patching things up with the person involved, and now we're both happy, and I don't regret that decision I made after all. It made our relationship become stronger than what it was those years ago. We learned our lessons and we learned how to not let the same thing happen again.

I think what I've learned from that experience is that it's always too soon to regret something. You never know what the effect of your actions are going to be. That reminds of this quote by Zhou Enlai when he was asked to assess the impact of the French Revolution. He replied with, "It's too soon to say." Something you regret now could make a huge difference in your life in the future, and it could be for the better. Besides, regretting something does not make the decision that you made go away, so instead of holding a grudge against yourself for making that decision, make it yourself's job to turn things around and make the situation better.


Sunday, August 4, 2013

Imagining The Future Is A Kind Of Nostalgia

So if you guys have been reading my blog for a while, you'd know that I like planning. I like envisioning an event down to the very last detail. I've been doing this ever since I was a young girl. I remember the first real "planning" that I had in my head was the "perfect Christmas" (In a large hall with brown walls and fake wood linoleum, the yellow lights low, dark green christmas garlands decorated with large christmas balls lining the low ceiling , and every adult wearing 90s-style suits, while every children are wearing dresses/tux). I must've been about 6 or 7 at the time. Of course that "perfect" christmas that I had in mind is yet to become a reality (I'm not giving up) but that's where my envisioning of things rooted from. I grew up and I then learned about new year's resolutions which is just a huge planning spree for me. Although it's very rare that they actually happen (I mean, just check my new year's resolutions from 7 months ago), the planning is always so much fun. The event I'm thinking of always comes out perfect, even though it's not actually, you know, real.

Kate suggested yesterday that for day four of BEDA, we talk about our ideal summer. This should be interesting for me because summer is my least favourite season so I don't really envision a lot of things for it, not as much as I daydream about winter, which is my favourite. But let's see.

My ideal summer would include:
  • My Friend in town
  • Lots of blue skies and a few wisps of white clouds
  • Not too hot, about 25C-27C maybe?
  • Lots of crop tops and maxi dresses and ROMPERS. Also short dresses.
  • Huge summer hats
  • Ice cream
  • Going out and doing things! Instead of wasting my summer away inside my room on tumblr. I mean that too is fun, but I can do that in the winter.
  • Places to go to would include: the beach, lots and lots of museums, botanical gardens, the park, 
  • Cool summer nights, you know the kind where you'll have to layer a cardigan of some sort over your romper to avoid freezing your ass off
  • Camping! Preferably on the beach.
  • Bonfire while frying marshmallows! Preferably on the beach.
  • Swimming! Whether on the beach or a water adventure park sort of place.
  • Music festivals yes yes yes
  • Conventions!!!! Vidcon, Leakycon, Comiccon yes lots of those
  • Theme parks at dusk
  • Warm rain and dancing under it
  • Thunderstorms and really round rain in the afternoon and being inside the house wrapped up in a cardigan sitting in a couch and drinking tea
  • Smoothies and Milkshakes
  • Money to do all these things

Saturday, August 3, 2013

Let's Talk About Supernatural

Not the show. Sorry, fangirls.

As she has talked about in her post yesterday, me and Kate are motivating each other to do BEDA this year, and one of the perks of that is when one of us runs out of things to talk about, we can put our heads together and think of a topic that we both could talk about. Initally Kate thought of using ghosts as a topic, but I want to expand that and talk about supernatural things in general, because my family actually has quite a lot of stories on that subject. My family on my mother's side is very superstitious. My aunt and my cousins always has some creepy stories to share so I would look forward to going to Batangas to visit them. Because as much as I'm very easily scared, supernatural or ghost stories intrigue me.

The earliest supernatural story that I can remember is about this huge duhat tree in front of our house. You see in Batangas in front of our house is a little lot where we can play, and where we usually kill a pig for lechon if there's any sort of special occasion. But in that lot is a little kubo under this huge duhat tree. I don't really know how we got to talking about it but my aunt and my cousins told me that that tree is supposedly haunted by an aswang, and is magical. Apparently if that tree was cut down, every single tree or shrub in the town of Talisay will die. I know it sounds far-fetched, even six year old me thought so. But the interesting thing that I found is that when I came back to the Philippines, to our house in Batangas, I discovered that our little lot is not ours anymore and it has been turned into a little warehouse for a business that delivers fish, but that tree is still there even though they would have a lot more space if they got rid of the tree. But apparently no one wanted to cut it down.

We were also told not to stray too far to the grassier part of that lot, because we were told that there were nuno there. Little dwarfs that live in little hills. And when I say little I mean miniscule, like you would barely see them, and you can step on their house if you're not careful. And if you do destroy their house, they will cast a curse on you. It has crossed my mind that the adults are just telling us these stories to scare us, but I always found it strange when said adults would whisper "tabi-tabi nuno, makikidaan po" (Excuse me, dwarf, may I please pass through) under their breaths when walking through grassy fields.

Some people have been allegedly cursed by this type of dwarf, and some of them would go to my grandmother for help. My mother's mother. (She has pretty strange stuff going on with her too but we'll get to that later.) Apparently she's an albularyo, or, a doctor but for supernatural stuff (my aunt is a bit of that too, they say). I've never seen her actually cure another cursed person off a disease but when I was younger and I'd get little tummy aches, which the adults would say is a result of my grandmother doting on me too much (bati), she would lick her thumb and she would put a little cross sign on my belly, and I do remember the tummy aches going away. Whether that's because of what she did, I don't know. But that's a thing that happened.

Now about my grandma. She passed away five years ago, and in the few months before her passing I heard quite a lot of stories from my mom and my aunt that involve her. One of them is her possessing an agimat, which is what helps her cure the curses of evil supernatural things. The story of that apparently started in the 1940s, when the japanese took over the Philippines in the second world war.

My grandfather (my mother's father) was a soldier who fought for the independence of the Philippines. It is said that they didn't have food during battles so they would end up eating the soles of their own shoes! My grandfather was so hungry at the time that he started looking around for wild berries that he could eat, and in doing so, he accidentally ate a fruit that was actually an agimat and that's when it all started. Before my grandfather finally died he went through quite a lot of hardship, because the agimat that was inside his body was demanding for it to be transferred to somebody else, so even though he wanted to die the agimat wouldn't let him. My grandmother finally took the agimat from him, and it is said that when my grandfather died, hundreds of thousands of ants came out of his nose, his eyes, his ears, and his mouth.

The same thing apparently happened to my grandmother, because not one of her children wanted the agimat. My mother apparently pretended to get it from her and tricked her, because she threw the agimat out instead of swallowing it as she was supposed to. When my grandmother died, goo instead of ants came out of her nose, eyes, ears, and mouth.

These stories may be true or may not be true. To me the authenticity of a story has little to do on how good the story is. And the supernatural stories my family has accumulated over the years make for very good stories indeed.


Friday, August 2, 2013

Running Out Of Topics Already

So we ended up not buying school shoes yesterday, and at this point I'm getting a bit panicked because I've only got less than a month to buy my school supplies and I've only got my bag. So I really need to start nagging my parents about that.

I spent most of yesterday watching Five Awesome Girls while painting my nails, and singing I LIKE GUYS WHO LIKE HARRY POTTER TO ME THEY COULDNT GET ANY HOTTERRR at the top of my lungs (the songs is Painfully Obvious by Lauren Fairweather) and also WOOOONT YOU BEEEE IN NERDFIGHTERLIKE WITH MEEEE (Nerdfighterlike also by Lauren Fairweather). I also wore a plastic silver tiara on my head all day, because I'm fabulous.

I have quite a creative way of painting my nails. I'm right handed, so that means that when I'm putting on nail varnish, the left hand always ends up absolutely impeccable. After that though I have to do the right hand, using my left hand that is still wet with nail varnish, and I usually end up with something like this:

Can we please ignore the fact that yes, I was wearing the same shirt yesterday as the day before. Check out my tiara though, don't I look regal.
I then take a shower or wash my hands and let the excess nail varnish on the skin part of my fingers wash away, and then I'm left with this:

(Yes I did just talk to you in detail about how I do my nails. The beauty/curse of BEDA is that you run out of things to talk about pretty quickly.)

I also spent a good part of yesterday reading a lot of online content. My friend Kate has a personal blog, and I caught up with it and I adore her writing style. If you want to check her out click here. Also, speaking of my friends, we have recently started a collab blog! Click here if you want to check that out. The title and address of the blog is not definite and we are definitely open to your suggestions, and yes we are not all blogging yet but we will be in a couple of weeks!

As for books, I've finished The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams a couple of nights ago or something and I just forgot to tell you, but I've started The Restaurant at the End of the Universe. I'm enjoying it so far! I like how we are exploring Zaphod Beeblebrox's character a little bit more, and I can't wait to see what the answers for all the mysteries in the book are. However I kind of got a bit tired last night of reading two books from the same series so to break it up a little bit, I picked up The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath. What's interesting about this book is that I've heard a lot of people's feelings about it, be it good or bad, but I don't actually know what it's about. So I'm going into it with no idea whatsoever about what I'm about to read and I like that.

Later guys,

Thursday, August 1, 2013

I'm doing BEDA!

I decided a few days ago that I'm going to (try to) do BEDA this year! It might be a pretty bad idea for me actually because, as you've seen, I'm pretty bad at commiting to something, but this year I'm going to try my best to actually make this happen. To blog everyday for the month of August. We shall see.

Today I'm going to hopefully go to town to buy a new pair of school shoes for September! I've been wanting to go to school since a couple of weeks ago and I reeeeally hope today we can get started on that!

Yesterday me and my friend went to town and we saw these creepers being sold for like 20 euro at the shop called Shoe Zone, and I love them. I've been looking for creepers for a while now because Jenn of clothesencounters on youtube says they're super comfortable. And because I'm short, I totally support shoes with a bit of heels and are comfortable at the same time. My only problem is that the shoes have velvet-y/suede-y material on them, and I'm pretty sure my school does not allow suede or velvet shoes. I hope my parents still get them for me even if I won't wear it to school though.

In another school news, have I showed you guys my obnoxiously loud bag?

Yep, that's what I'm bringing to school. Everyday. For the next two years. It's huge inside, so I'm going to be able to fit a lot in, and also it's super warm when I wear it so that should come in handy. My only problem with it is that the zipper snags on the fur whenever I open it, so if anybody has any idea of how I can avoid that that would be great!

I'm actually pretty excited about going back to school. Transition Year didn't have a lot of theory stuff to learn and I think I actually kind of miss it. Also this year, I'm not studying any subject that I loathe (coughgeographycough), so I'm looking forward to that too! I actually miss having a routine so much so while I absolutely adore lazy days when I just sit on my bed all day watching Clarissa Explains It All, I'm pretty happy going back to school.

See you guys again tomorrow,